suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Houston, we have a blender
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize