it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
