She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
