Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
