I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
