she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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