you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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