Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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