I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
