i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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