i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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