I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
