is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Come share oat with me in your robe
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
