So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
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