this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
