So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
well you can't waste a boner
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
BRING THE BAGELS
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
