your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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