dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Randomize
