i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize
