What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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