yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
