this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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