think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
