I forgot how hot balto sounded
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
