He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
