I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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