Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
