the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
