party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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