I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
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