oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
