I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
