You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
