he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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