its not stalking. its research.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
