office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Randomize