I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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