Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Randomize
