is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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