you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
no you cant smoke seaweed
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Are my feet made of real feet?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
