My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
