Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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