Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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