I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize