Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
