Three words: puerto rican gang bang
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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