i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize