just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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