I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
