I have demons in me.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
